So. Very. Accurate.
So. Very. Accurate.
Guest: (walking through lobby)
Concierge #1: (notices guest face has had $6788364837 worth of plastic surgery)
Guest: (walks closer)
Concierge #2: (stares straight ahead trying not to make eye contact with concierge #1)
Concierge #1: (holding back extreme laughter)
Concierge #2: (staring straight ahead and makes eye contact with guest) Hi!
Guest: (death stare super curse from hell, walks out towards bar)
Concierge #1: (grabs desk still holding back laughter, looks over at concierge #2) WTF JUST HAPPENED?
Concierge #2: Pretty sure she just placed a curse on me…
Concierge #1: YEP! (dies laughing)
You know what’s NOT funny? Hurricanes.
Guest: Is there anything transportation like that can pick us up here, take us around town where we want to go, and bring us back here?
Concierge: The only thing I can think of like that would be a cab.
Guest: There is no shuttle that can pick us up here to do that? We have 6 people.
Concierge: If you have too many people for a regular cab you can always try a minivan cab or a limo.
Guest: Really, there is no shuttle service that stops here to do that?
Concierge: I think a cab or a limo is your best bet. There are no personalized shuttles to take people on personalized tours.
Guest: (non believing tone) oooooook.
Text from guest: We would like to book a tour to the Pollination Cultural Center
Guest: Hey… do you have ear buds?
Concierge: Excuse me? Like ear plugs to block sound, or headphones for music?
Guest: For music. Can I have some ear buds?
Concierge: Sorry I don’t have things like that here, you can go to the ABC store and buy some, its down the street.
Guest: Oh… ok. Do you have a phone charger?
Guest: You don’t have an iphone 5 charger I can use?!?
Concierge: There is a Best Buy and an Apple store you can go to for things like that.
Guest: Whatever (walks away mad)
Guest: Hi, how far is the zoo?
Concierge: It’s about a 20 minute walk from here, just straight down the street.
Guest: Ok, great. Is there any major landmarks that we will see to help us find it?
Concierge: Yes, the zoo.
Concierge: Hello! What can I help you with today?
Guest: (mouth open, blank stare)
Concierge: Did you have a question or something?
Guest: (blank stare)
Concierge: Sooooo…. Are you looking for something or someone?
Guest: (blank stare, hands paper for free gift)
Concierge: Ok, here you go! Now did you have any questions or anything?
Guest: (speaking in a low tone that only dogs can hear)
Guest: Thank you. (walks away)
Guest: Excuse me, do you have a trash can?
Concierge: Of course (holds out hand expecting small paper or whatever)
Guest: (pulls out garbage bag and sets it on the desk)
Concierge: Are you serious?
Guest: (walks away)