Tales of a Creep Magnet part 2

Guest: (walking through lobby)

Concierge #1: (notices guest face has had $6788364837 worth of plastic surgery)

Guest: (walks closer)

Concierge #2: (stares straight ahead trying not to make eye contact with concierge #1)

Concierge #1: (holding back extreme laughter)

Concierge #2: (staring straight ahead and makes eye contact with guest) Hi!

Guest: (death stare super curse from hell, walks out towards bar)

Concierge #1: (grabs desk still holding back laughter, looks over at concierge #2) WTF JUST HAPPENED?

Concierge #2: Pretty sure she just placed a curse on me…

Concierge #1: YEP! (dies laughing)

Are you famous?

Guest: Is there anything transportation like that can pick us up here, take us around town where we want to go, and bring us back here?

Concierge: The only thing I can think of like that would be a cab.

Guest: There is no shuttle that can pick us up here to do that? We have 6 people.

Concierge: If you have too many people for a regular cab you can always try a minivan cab or a limo.

Guest: Really, there is no shuttle service that stops here to do that?

Concierge: I think a cab or a limo is your best bet. There are no personalized shuttles to take people on personalized tours.

Guest: (non believing tone) oooooook.

This is not Best Buy

Guest: Hey… do you have ear buds?

Concierge: Excuse me? Like ear plugs to block sound, or headphones for music?

Guest: For music. Can I have some ear buds?

Concierge: Sorry I don’t have things like that here, you can go to the ABC store and buy some, its down the street.

Guest: Oh… ok. Do you have a phone charger?

Concierge: No…

Guest: You don’t have an iphone 5 charger I can use?!?

Concierge: There is a Best Buy and an Apple store you can go to for things like that.

Guest: Whatever (walks away mad)

I can’t…

Concierge: Hello! What can I help you with today?

Guest: (mouth open, blank stare)

Concierge: Did you have a question or something?

Guest: (blank stare)

Concierge: Sooooo…. Are you looking for something or someone?

Guest: (blank stare, hands paper for free gift)

Concierge: Ok, here you go! Now did you have any questions or anything?

Guest: (speaking in a low tone that only dogs can hear)

Guest: Thank you. (walks away)